Communication Through Body Language
Communication is how human beings interact with the world that surrounds them. There are many forms of communication, some being more effective at conveying the intent or feelings of the individual expressing than others. Many people have a hard time with communication, and can find it difficult to tell others what they think or to give them bad news. Sometimes, they can’t find the right words to express the things they want to say. There are also those people who are not to be believed due to a history of dishonesty or embellishing the truth. One form of communication, however, is always honest and can always be counted on.
Body language is a form of communication that is performed subconsciously. It occurs almost constantly, and will almost always give the correct impression that a person has of someone else, the environment, or the situation at hand. Body language makes it easy to know if someone is nervous, scared, interested, or focused, among many other feelings that could be happening.
Learning to read body language can be as simple as paying attention to your own body when feeling specific emotions. For example, if you are able to notice the unconscious things that your body does when you are nervous, then it should be simple for you to be able to see when another person is nervous in a certain situation. Often, reading the body language of another person will tell you more than having an actual conversation would, especially if the conversation has the potential to be uncomfortable or is something that no one wants to acknowledge.
On the lighter side of body language communication, it can be a very helpful tool in determining how interested another person is in you. When single people meet for the first time, reading the signs of body language can help you to determine if this person has any interest in you beyond friendship. If on a date, the person leans towards you when you are speaking or has their arms at their sides with the front of their body facing towards you, that is a sign that signifies a true interest in the things you are saying. If, on the other hand, they have their arms crossed, are leaning back in their chair with their back turned towards you, and are avoiding contact, they probably are not interested. These are some good physical indicators that you could be wasting your time.
http://www.typesofcommunication.org/communication/nonverbal-communication/communication-through-body-language/
Signs of Deception:
Body Language of Lies:
• Physical expression will be limited and stiff, with few arm and hand movements. Hand, arm and leg movement are toward their own body the liar takes up less space.
• A person who is lying to you will avoid making eye contact.
• Hands touching their face, throat & mouth. Touching or scratching the nose or behind their ear.Not likely to touch his chest/heart with an open hand.
Emotional Gestures & Contradiction
• Timing and duration of emotional gestures and emotions are off a normal pace. The display of emotion is delayed, stays longer it would naturally, then stops suddenly.
• Timing is off between emotions gestures/expressions and words. Example: Someone says "I love it!" when receiving a gift, and then smile after making that statement, rather then at the same time the statement is made.
• Gestures/expressions don’t match the verbal statement, such as frowning when saying “I love you.”
• Expressions are limited to mouth movements when someone is faking emotions (like happy, surprised, sad, awe, )instead of the whole face. For example; when someone smiles naturally their whole face is involved: jaw/cheek movement, eyes and forehead push down, etc.
Interactions and Reactions
• A guilty person gets defensive. An innocent person will often go on the offensive.
• A liar is uncomfortable facing his questioner/accuser and may turn his head or body away.
• A liar might unconsciously place objects (book, coffee cup, etc.) between themselves and you.
Verbal Context and Content
• A liar will use your words to make answer a question. When asked, “Did you eat the last cookie?” The liar answers, “No, I did not eat the last cookie.”
•A statement with a contraction is more likely to be truthful: “ I didn't do it” instead of “I did not do it”
• Liars sometimes avoid "lying" by not making direct statements. They imply answers instead of denying something directly.
• The guilty person may speak more than natural, adding unnecessary details to convince you... they are not comfortable with silence or pauses in the conversation.
• A liar may leave out pronouns and speak in a monotonous tone. When a truthful statement is made the pronoun is emphasized as much or more than the rest of the words in a statement.
• Words may be garbled and spoken softly, and syntax and grammar may be off. In other
words, his sentences will likely be muddled rather than emphasized.
Other signs of a lie:
• If you believe someone is lying, then change subject of a conversation quickly, a liar follows along willingly and becomes more relaxed. The guilty wants the subject changed; an innocent person may be confused by the sudden change in topics and will want to back to the previous subject.
• Using humor or sarcasm to avoid a subject.
http://www.blifaloo.com/info/lies.php
Body Language to show lies:
1. Limited physical movements and face expression. This is due to the fact that lying is stressful and a cheater would try to maintain control of the situation making sure you accept the lie.
2. Tighter lips.
3. Forehead tightens; often you can see wrinkles between the eyebrows.
4. The cheater takes less space literally (shoulder may be pulled back or elbows are pulled back to the side of body).
5. Speaking in monotonous tone leaving out lots of pronouns in sentences.
6. Trailing off end of sentences, hesitation in the tone of voice.
7. Talking a little faster than normal and the voice pitch is higher than normal.
8. Answering questions a little slower than normal – especially if followed by excessive eye movements.
9. Often a cheater will touch his face especially nose, mouth and chin area subconsciously. Earlobes and behind the ear are also areas to watch out for.
10. Paler face and hands – or extremely red face and hands.
11. Breathing more heavily – you can even hear it at times.
12. Avoiding eye contact – squinting or even closing eyes when talking to you.
13. Increased heart rate (This is not very easy to detect on its own).
14. Palms are not revealed, it’s in a closed position.
15. Emotional gesture is longer than usual, and it suddenly stops or changes.
16. The expression of the lower part of face does not match the eyes.
17. Emotional expression does not match words being said.18. Avoiding certain subjects by using humour or sarcasm.
19. Placing objects between you and the cheater or standing far from you.
20. On the contrary, standing a little too close to you to imitate closeness.
21. He may turn his body away when being asked something he is not comfortable to answer. Try bringing up the subject ‘signs of infidelity’ and see if he gets uncomfortable.
22. He gets defensive rather than offensive.
23. He will also be very happy if you change the subject rather than getting confused why you brought up the previous subject in the first place.
24. The cheater will use more words and reasons to explain actions he does that show signs of infidelity. His sentences are complex and seem to be perfect to convince you of his lies.
25. He uses longer sentences to buy time so that he can lie on the spot better.
26. His answers are not direct.
27. He is uncomfortable with silence as he is wondering whether or not he’s about to get caught lying.
http://www.cheating-spouse-alert.com/signs-of-infidelity.html
Covering One's Mouth
This is an instinctual gesture that first appears in early childhood. A lying person covers his mouth with his hand as if he is trying to prevent the deceitful words from being said. It could be just few fingers covering the lips, or the whole fist - the meaning doesn't change.
However, do not forget to interpret this gesture in cluster with other signs and movements.
If the person who is using this gesture is the one who is speaking, it means he might be lying. However, if you are speaking and the listener is the one who is using this gesture, it might mean that he feels that you are not totally honest and sincere with him.
"Be quiet" gesture, i.e. covering your mouth with one finger, was probably used by your parents when they wanted to calm you. Now when you are adult you still subconsciously use this gesture or its variation (like covering your mouth with few fingers or the whole fist) when you know you are hiding something or are not completely open about your feelings
Touching One's Nose
Among common signs of lying is the nose touch. It seems that nose touch is connected to original mouth covering gesture that is so obvious in children. But because adults are more conscious about body signs they are displaying, the hand is quickly pulled away from the mouth which results in a quick nose touching gesture.
You can tell the difference between "normal" nose itch and nose touch that is from the signs of lying. Simple itch will be satisfied with rubbing or scratching, but won't be satisfied with just a light touch as it happens when the person is lying.
And again, if the speaker is the one who displays the nose touch gesture, it means he could be lying. If it is the listener who does it, then he simply could doubt what he is hearing.
Scratching One's Neck
Another sign of lying is scratching the neck below the earlobe around five times. This is also often a sign of doubting or disagreeing with what has been said.
Grabbing One's Ear
When a little child hears something she doesn't like she covers both her ears as if to prevent herself from hearing the sound. Adults are more conscious about what they do with their body, so instead of obvious ear covering gesture, they could quickly touch the earlobe, or rub the back of the ear, or screw back and forth inside of the ear.
If you were speaking and the person verbally agrees with what you say but at the same time does the ear touching gesture, it probably means that he is not sincere with you. From another side it could also mean that you spoke a lot and he wants to speak now.
Rubbing One's Eyes
Similarly to ear touching gesture, rubbing one's eyes could be one of the signs of lying (if the person who does it is the speaker), or a sign of disliking of what the one sees. Men usually rub their eyes vigorously. Women's way to do it is more gentle and more brief (probably for not smudging make-up). Both could also look away while lying.
As it was said above, interpret these gestures in context with the circumstances and other signs that you observe. Particularly signs that happen automatically and are not under conscious control (see Body Language of a Liar for more information about these signs). Eye reading might give you the most accurate information about others, because pupils work independently of conscious control.
The power of eyes is undeniable. We say sad eyes, happy eyes, angry eyes, piercing eyes, bedroom eyes. Eye reading ability is obviously present in each of us, although it is not clear how exactly we do it. When we meet someone for the first time we make series of quick judgments based on what we see in his or her eyes.
People's mood changes find their expression in their eyes. As Eckhard Hess, biopsychologist at the University of Chicago noticed, the pupil size is affected by one's emotion. If you are excited, your pupils can dilate up to four times.
Conversely, if you are experiencing anger or another negative emotion, your pupils shrink in size. Eckhard Hess tested this by showing pin-ups of the opposite sex to heterosexual men and women. When they saw the pin ups the pupils of their eyes would enlarge. Interestingly, the pupils of participant would shrink if he or she saw pin-ups of the same sex person. Not fun!
Similarly, when people were asked to look at pleasant pictures of non-sexual character their pupils would enlarge. If they looked at unpleasant pictures like images of disabled children their pupils would shrink.
In another study Eckhard Hess showed men two sets of images of women. In the first one, the pupils of each woman were enlarged. In the second one, the pupils of each woman had been reduced. As a result, men preferred the photos of the women with enlarged pupils, however none of them could explain what made the difference.
The same was true with group of women when they were shown two sets of images of men. Women preferred images of men with enlarged pupils.
The discoveries made by Hess in seventies were successfully applied as an effective way of increasing sales of such products like cosmetics, clothing and hair products. This was achieved by altering photos of models to make the pupil area larger.
In another study, Hess showed participants pictures of a naked man, a naked woman, a mother and a baby, a baby and a landscape. Men's pupils were the largest when they saw the picture of a naked woman. Women's pupils were the largest when they saw the picture of the mother and the baby. Naked man's picture was at the second place!
Dilating pupils are also signal of courtship. Maybe this is the reason why romantic encounters succeed in dimly lit places, because pupils naturally dilate in such light conditions.
The lovers gaze into each other's eyes subconsciously looking for pupil-dilation. Pupil dilation has reciprocal effect. When men looked at images of women with dilated pupils their pupils enlarged and vice-versa.
Similarly to body language, eye contact is a form of non-verbal communication. By the means of eye contact people express their emotions, including attraction. Eye contact is such a powerful stuff (see
The Power of Eye Contact) that most people will try to avoid in most situations.
There are several kinds of eye contact that have different meanings. For example, a brief eye contact that lasts just a split second simply means that the person acknowledges your existence, kind of way of saying 'I see you'.
Longer eye contact that lasts 1-2 seconds could mean that the person recognizes you or that he or she finds you attractive and could be interested.
Extended eye contact that lasts 3 or more seconds means that the person is definitely interested and you affect him or her.
If you noticed that anything more than split of a second feels uncomfortable, because it definitely holds a meaning. Longer eye contact goes beyond our comfort zone. The longer it lasts the stronger is the interest. It is also a definite sign of boldness and confidence. On another hand, looking away first could mean less interest, but not necessary. It could also mean shyness or feeling intimidated.
Eye contact is not only a sign of interest it is also a way to increase other person's interest in you or even make him or her fall in love with you (see
The Power of Eye Contact for the scientific explanation to this phenomenon).
Conclusion
A research conducted at Cambridge University showed that both men and women have ability to correctly interpret eye signals (friendly eyes, worried eyes, relaxed eyes, eyes expressing the desire). The scientists still don't know how sending and decoding eye signals works, but it is obvious that humans have the capability of eye reading. Moreover, they are better at eye reading than at decoding other body language signals with women scoring better than men.
http://www.askwomennet.com/eye-reading.html
